Unstitched Read online

  Unstitched

  Jacquie Underdown

  www.escapepublishing.com.au

  Unstitched

  Jacquie Underdown

  A new adult story about what happens when you meet the perfect guy at the worst possible time.

  Anthea has loved him since her earliest memory, but she has no idea who he is, or if he even exists. But her heart belongs to him, and no one else can ever take his place. That is until she stumbles into Lucas, lead singer of Perennial. He is sexy as hell, passionate, and, most importantly, knows the answers to questions that Anthea has always had.

  Lucas knows he is different from other guys — but Anthea is different to other girls. He is drawn to her, craves her, needs her. He also has secrets. Secrets that will tear Anthea apart. He needs to share them, but to share them could end their relationship, and Lucas isn’t willing to take that risk. But secrets have a way of coming out, and Lucas can’t stay forever.

  Theirs is a passion that is meant to last forever, but time isn’t always quite so linear…

  About the Author

  Jacquie resides in hot and steamy Central Queensland, Australia, with her husband and two sons. On permanent hiatus from a profession she doesn’t love, she now spends her time wrapped up in her imagination creating characters and exploring alternative realities.

  Jacquie is an author of a number of novels, novellas and short stories that are emotionally driven and possess unique themes beyond the constraints of the physical universe. She strives to offer romance, but with complexity; spirituality, without the religion; love, with a tantalising splash of spice.

  Her novels express a purpose and offer subtle messages about life, the spirit and, of course, love.

  Acknowledgements

  Much thanks to Kate Cuthbert for your continued belief and guidance, along with all the fabulous staff at Escape Publishing and Harlequin. And a very special thanks to my husband for supporting me completely, so that I may do what I love. One day, I’ll pay it forward.

  For Brad and my boys

  Contents

  About the Author

  Acknowledgements

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Bestselling Titles by Escape Publishing…

  Chapter 1

  Anthea

  I stared at the god on the stage, guitar in his hand, darkest brown hair falling around his ears and neck. A coil tightened in my stomach and speared tension lower. I crossed one leg in front of the other and clenched — both pleasure and aching pain.

  He was as sexy as fuck. No, even sexier than that. Christ, just looking upon that tall, muscled frame, decked out in black ripped jeans and a black t-shirt, made my blood warm and ebb to those pleasure-seeking parts of my body.

  His voice was low and husky, perfectly in tune. The song he sang told of heartache and love lost, and, as he hit a higher melody, each note sluiced down my body like rain, soaking me in his pain. My heart heaved, goose bumps pimpled my flesh; tears ached in the back of my throat and danced in my eyes.

  His lyrics spoke of the hollowness that has scorched my insides since I was a little girl. A hollowness, which has had me endlessly seeking something I could never quite place. His entire manner, the rise and fall of the melody, the slow slide of his fingers over the strings of his guitar, seemed to simulate all of that. Maybe that’s why his words felt so personal, as though I wasn’t just a pair of eyes in a room full of hundreds of others, but, instead, the only person in an audience of one. And his story was like salve for my soul because it implied that someone else understood.

  I closed my eyes and let his song caress me until the last chord was strummed, the last note was sung and the final beat was drummed. I again peered up at him and the room fell to silence — not one murmur, not one cheer, when his eyes met mine and we watched each other.

  My body buzzed and heat rushed to my cheeks. Those eyes, vividly green, almost luminescent, penetrated me. They occupied a space inside of me, knowing my bones, veins and blood before my skin and imperfections. My lips parted on a rushed inhale. Yearning for more than a mere look from across a crowded room, my flesh tingled with need. It was as though my body thrummed with a thieved memory. Memory ignited by those wandering green eyes pursuing every part of me, every secret and nook, every void and slope. I had never craved someone more than I did in that moment. My bones ached, my heart trembled and my flesh was burning to ashes.

  This sexy stranger had set me on fire with a single glance and I knew I would never be the same again. Ever.

  Then the spell broke as the drummer counted in the next song with four quick cracks of his drumsticks in the air, and the singer broke his gaze. All noise came streaming back with a beastly roar. My knees quaked, hands shook.

  My God. What the fuck just happened?

  Brendt grabbed me from behind, his strong arms sliding around my middle. He laughed in my ear, a rough tumble of sound, so male, so Brendt. ‘Anthea? Did you not hear me?’ he asked.

  ‘You said something?’ I yelled over my shoulder, loud enough to be heard above the din, but still not willing to turn away from the singer.

  Brendt lifted me into his arms and slung me over his shoulder. I giggled and shrieked as he carried me through the thick throng of heated bodies. The scent of sweat and sweetly stale alcohol stirred in our wake. ‘We’re heading to another bar,’ he said, his shoulders shaking with laughter. He slapped my arse, hard enough for me to feel it through my jeans, and said, ‘Now stop squirming or I’ll drop you.’

  He didn’t put me down until we joined Rachel and Roslyn, who were waiting near the exit. I straightened my rucked shirt and ran fingers through my long hair, disentangling the knots.

  I grinned at Brendt then twisted my face with mock reproach. ‘Gee, caveman, you know I can walk. It’s a skill I learnt about, I don’t know, twenty years ago.’

  Brendt laughed, his thick chest vibrating. His blue eyes were sparkling. ‘I know. I like to throw my muscle around every now and then, just to remind you all I have them.’ He lifted one arm and tensed a bulging bicep.

  ‘Oh, that muscle,’ said Roslyn, grinning with half her mouth. ‘I thought you were going to show us the muscle us girls really care about.’ She winked and dropped her eyes to his fly.

  Rachel linked elbows with Brendt and leant her head against him. ‘Eyes and hands off my boyfriend. And no talking about his impressive muscle…I mean…muscles.’

  We all laughed loudly and swayed out onto the sidewalk. I raised my face to the darkened star-speckled sky and let the cool breeze chill my hot cheeks. The air was scented with rain, which obviously fell while we were inside, drenching the road and sidewalk.

  Despite the alcohol tickling my senses, I couldn’t shake the eddying anxiety — a reminder, whispering in my ear about the events of today that prompted this bender. Leith had sex with you to win a thousand dollars. That’s all you’re worth to him.

  ***

  Brendt

  We were all trying to distract Anthea from what that prick did to her, yet there I was unable to think of anything else. I clenched my fist, the knuckles popping. Pain sliced f
rom my hand all the way up my arm and I winced.

  My hand was bruised and swollen, a nice little cut across a couple of fingers, but I shook out the pain. I was vibrating and tensing, knowing that Leith, in a roundabout way, had caused this.

  Mother fucker.

  Anthea swayed in front of me and I caught her by the hips, so she didn’t fall to the ground. She was drunk. Understandably. I’d be drunk too if I’d been through what she’d just been through. That same anger and adrenalin, which I felt just before I smashed my fist into Leith’s face, burned afresh in my veins. I found it hard to stop myself, to not lay in to him with all that I had.

  I pulled Anthea under my arm, let her use me for balance while I used her for calm. She didn’t deserve any of this. I should’ve done more than break Leith’s nose. I should have…

  Anthea lifted my hand into hers and gently traced over the swollen knuckles. My eyelids were heavy, wanting to close, so I would feel her touch more deeply. But I controlled my reactions and pushed those feelings deep down. She looked up at me with her cute face, those honey-brown eyes and long, long eyelashes, smiled and lowered her eyes quickly.

  ‘I’m sorry,’ her tongue was thickening her s’s so they sounded like sh’s, ‘for getting you caught up in all this mess.’

  I shook my head and stopped walking. Rachel and Roslyn didn’t notice, kept chattering with each other and edged further ahead. I squeezed my arm around her tighter and waited for her to look up at me. And she did — glossy fawn eyes wide and eyebrows high.

  ‘Anthea, you’re my best friend. It’s my job to get involved.’

  Anthea shrugged and pressed her lips together. She ran gentle fingers across my grazed knuckle again and focused on my hand. ‘I hate that you’re hurt.’ A tear fell down her cheek. I watched it roll over her lips and chin, envying that tear and hating the man who caused it.

  I wiped at her cheek with my palm and couldn’t stop my thumb finding her full bottom lip and dragging over the pink, salty flesh. My breaths grew heavier, heart raced, as much as I tried to steady them both. And then my cock twitched under my jeans as I was flooded with thoughts of taking that lush lip between my own and invading her warm mouth with my tongue.

  I pulled away and stepped back one pace.

  Back the fuck up, Brendt.

  Heart thudding, I glanced up the pathway; Rachel and Roslyn had stopped, but were chatting madly with each other, arms flailing, their heads tilting back with laughter, oblivious of me. Breaths came a little easier.

  ‘I hate that you’re hurt, too,’ I said quickly and strode away to catch up with the girls. She followed, keeping a pace or two behind.

  ***

  Anthea

  I hurried along the fluoro-lit streets behind Brendt as music gushed from passing bars and restaurants. I didn’t want to bring it up. Not tonight. Not when I was doing so well to bury it down in the pit of my belly and smother it with stomach acid and booze. But it frothed and burned a passage up my throat until it lingered foul of my tongue — sour. Then when I saw the bruising across Brendt’s knuckles, it all came tumbling back like a steel-capped boot to my head.

  Brendt’s a good friend, truly, to have done what he did to help me out. Especially when I’d been so gullible, so…stupid!

  I trusted Leith. I thought I really liked him. Hell, I thought he liked me too. A laugh almost escaped from my scowling lips, for ever expecting anything different. Me and love, we just didn’t mix.

  I know, I know — twenty-three years old. There’s time enough for love and heartbreak and having it all come good in the end. But I wasn’t like other girls my age. I wasn’t like anyone else I knew. I was damaged goods, as though some magical being had come along and pulled on the threads of my heart, slowly unstitching me and never bothering to repair the tethers. The ironic part of it was: I didn’t even know how I came to be this way.

  Rachel and Roslyn pushed through the doors of the bar spilling the music onto us. The beat found me and vibrated my heart. The scent of artificial smoke and booze slipped out the entry to mingle with the air and wrap around me. Brendt held the door open, not meeting my eyes.

  Why can’t he look at me? Then the sinking feeling of guilt as it knotted in my guts returned. Oh, right, because of that weird lip-rubbing, chemistry-popping, eye-staring moment back there. Last thing I needed was more guy trouble, especially with a guy that was my best friend’s boyfriend. I strained a smile and stepped through into the dim club, heaving with bodies.

  I headed to the bar: long and made of sleek marble. A showcase of spirits on mirrored shelves sat against the wall behind. I sidled in between Rachel and Roslyn. Their hips were rocking to the beats, arms pumping in the air. I threw my arms around their shoulders and yelled, ‘Who’s up for shots?

  Rachel grinned devilishly.

  ‘Hellz yeah,’ said Roslyn. She threw her attention left and right, behind her, weighing up the quality of men in the room. Her eyes landed on one at a table behind us, tall with brooding brown eyes. ‘And then I’m going to find me some action,’ she said grinning at the man. He smiled back and winked, a cheeky dimple flashing.

  I often wished I was more like Roslyn — able to conjure a strong sense of detachment from love and romance, and simply feed one’s healthy appetite for mind-blowing sex. I thought of the singer back at the other bar, how he managed to fuck me with his eyes. Did I have it in me to do away with this ridiculous ideal of love and commitment and take the chance on a one-night-stand? Could I simply give in to my body’s basest needs, no strings attached? Just like Leith did.

  My heart ached with that familiar sensation and I pushed my hand to my chest. Longing, as deep as a bottomless lake, crashed into me and caressed me roughly with chastising hands and sharp teeth. I wanted to scream. I was sick of this, the always not-so-subtle reminder that I was built differently, and the constant yearning for that something I could never quite place.

  I could ignore it, but look what happened the last time I ignored these feelings. Leith — his hands running over my bare skin, body grinding against mine, grunting and panting in my ear as he pushed himself hard and deep inside of me, like he was an animal and I was nothing. Filling me with his bad intentions, over and over until he pulled out and pumped his pungent evidence of conquest all over my belly.

  Acid frothed again in my stomach leaving a bitter taste in my mouth. I didn’t want to be thinking about this anymore. About Leith. But these thoughts were insidious.

  My hands trembled. I buried them deep in my pockets. Brendt’s words from this morning as he told me the news, rang loud again in my head. ‘Leith was bet one thousand dollars that he’d be able to fuck you… He filmed the entire event on his phone… I broke his nose and his phone, but he’d already sent the video to others… I’m so sorry I didn’t know about this sooner.’

  Tears tightened the back of my throat. I shook my head and motioned to the bartender. ‘Four tequila shots. Hurry. Please.’

  The shots were lined up on the bar, along with a wedge of lime and shake of salt on the back of our hands.

  ‘One, two, three,’ said Brendt and we each licked, shot and sucked. Warmth slid down my throat, burning, followed by a chaser of jaw-aching sour lime.

  I winced and squirmed as I slammed the shooter glass back onto the bar. ‘Another,’ I said to the bartender. He slopped more tequila into our glasses. I threw it down, then another, and another, until I felt Leith finally slipping away.

  ***

  Lucas

  I was packing the band’s gear into the van I’d parked out the back of the bar. As I mindlessly rolled electrical cord, I thought about seeing Anthea earlier — how I knew she was there before I saw her beautiful brown eyes staring up at me, as though we were connected by an ethereal cord that tingled when in close proximity. She was breathtaking. I could barely remember the chords I needed to strum, the words I had to sing, despite her being their inspiration.

  My heart paced, veins surged with adrenalin and hope.r />
  ‘Fuck, man, what’s with the goofy grin on your face all night,’ said my bass guitarist, David.

  I shook my head and looked at him, forgetful that there was anyone else even around. ‘Um…’

  David laughed, loud and deep. ‘Hasn’t got anything to do with that chick you were eyeballing during the set?’

  A smile danced across my lips as I shrugged and threw the cord into the back of the van. ‘Na, just…you know…’

  David laughed again. ‘Man, you’re losing it. And if it was, maybe, about that girl, then you might wanna go talk to her.’

  I narrowed my eyes. ‘What?’

  ‘She’s standing over near the exit. Looks like she’s waiting for you.’

  Heart at presto staccato, I struggled to control my reactions. But this wasn’t the time to be screwing up my plans well before they’d even begun to be put in place. Semi-composed, I lifted my eyes, captured hers, and smiled wide. She smiled back.

  Wow, she was more stunning than the dim lighting inside the bar could do her justice: long, chocolate hair falling in waves down her back, silky white skin. The street light was pouring over her, highlighting every curve of her body.

  She walked towards me, her features tense with concentration, trying not to sway, and I had to bite back a laugh. She was simply adorable.

  ‘Hello,’ she said when barely a metre away and looked up at me, her eyes sparkling.

  I had to force-feed my lungs breath. I rested a hand against the van behind me for balance. ‘Hi.’

  She grinned and looked down at her feet, then those brown beauties met my eyes again and she said, holding out her hand, ‘I’m Anthea. Anthea Lewis.’

  I took her hand in mine, shook it. Should it feel this good to touch her flesh? Skin on skin — electric. I squared my shoulders back, tried to hide my breathlessness. ‘Good to meet you, Anthea. I’m Lucas Ryan.’

  ‘You probably hear this a lot, and I apologise if you have, but I think you’re an amazing singer. Just brilliant. And your band, they’re amazing, too.’